Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Taking a Little Inventory

I thought it might be a good idea to list some reasons why I am choosing to have a life changing surgery. When I am having "one of those days" which I know will come, I can look back at the list and tell myself...this is why you did this.

I originally wrote this down in July 2005, the first time I contemplated weight loss surgery but didn't follow through. These were the list of reasons why I was thinking about WLS. Warning...This could be a particularly long post, but I think it will provide some clarity later on...

Gastric Bypass July 26, 2005

Want to start the insurance pre-authorization process. Need to find out more information about the procedure, costs, doctors, etc. Get a consultation, find insurance providers.

Reasons to have it done:

300+ lbs.
Insulin resistance
Increased blood pressure
Breathing problems
Acid Reflux
Back and knee pain
I don't want to die (risks for stroke, heart attack, diabetes, etc.)

Don't fit into airplane seats
Afraid I am going to break chairs
Self esteem
Dating/marriage prospects
Hard to find clothing my size
I don't like myself this way
I've tried other ways on my own and failed
Want to be more active, able to do anything I want

Extreme measures/irreversible
Changing habits
Missing out because of new lifestyles


Clothes were always hard to find, remember having to order "Pretty Plus" from the Sears Catalog
Never wore popular styles/brands like other kids did
Diets on and off since middle school/high school
Weight has continued to increase little by little each year
Most I have ever lost at one time is 10-15 lbs. *(later 45+) and I always gained it back
Been more cognizant of my size lately, like having to ask for a seatbelt extender on airplanes. I don't fit into a lot of chairs with arms (i.e. restaurants, etc.).
Don't get to do things because I know I won't fit. (i.e. race cars at Wiley
I get swollen ankles when I fly or drive long distances
I have had trouble breathing, bloating and constipation for about a year, I believe they are weight related.
I have self esteem issues because of my weight. I have never dated, don't feel confident about ever finding someone who could love a fat person.
I dream of being able to buy fun clothes, doing things like running, the freedom to choose any activity without worrying about my size.
I want to be "pretty"

Weight Loss Attempts/Results:

Swimming and walking Summer 1993 15 pounds (gained back)
Richard Simmons and walking
Spring/Summer 1999, 2000, 2001, 2003 10-12 lbs. (gained back)
On and off diets
Stuff on Oprah, TV, Magazines etc.
Never tried formal plan, such as Weight Watchers or Curves
Kept food diary and exercise logs
Been heavy from the time I was about 8 or 9 years old
Remember weight on first drivers license at about 16 years old was 220 but I lied and put 190
Stayed at 275 for a long time from college to about 2003
Hit my high mark of over 300 lbs. in June/July 2005. Not sure of exact weight because my scale only goes to 299, after that it just says "OL" for over limit.
I wear a 3X or 4X in my shirts, 4X (26-28) is more comfortable. I can't fit a 3X in a non-knit shirt. My pants size is 28W which is nearly impossible to find in regular stores. I have had to do more catalog shopping in the women's extended sizes (i.e. JCPenney)
It is harder to do simple tasks such as getting up from a chair, getting
down on my knees or sitting with my legs crossed "Indian style" and then getting back up.
This is embarrassing but it is more difficult to care for myself. I hardly fit into small bathtubs and shaving my legs is a chore. It's also hard to have the energy to keep up with housework and chores.
It's getting harder to exercise without severe back or leg pain. Mowing my small lawn is a challenge and I take several breaks.
My rings stopped fitting my fingers
It's harder to get out of cars, walk up stairs and hills

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