Then the sliming really kicked in. Then I was really feeling a PB coming on and then suddenly my body decided that I needed a combination cough/PB and suddenly I am driving down the road at 65 miles an hour and there is a ball of slime being projected out of my mouth! My hand was the only thing stoping a large ball of slime from covering the windshield. I was literally holding a handful of slime trying to drive, reach for a tissue...an empty cup...an empty water bottle...anything to contain this wad...literally, a cup full of oozing alien slime. Damn who cleaned out my car? What in the world can I spew into? Should I pull over? Damn too much traffic! Finally I found a Wal-Mart bag and I deposited my slime, hoping to heaven that there wasn't a hole in the bottom of the bag. Now, that I have finally put down the slime ball, I see a napkin stuffed between the seats. I grab it and attempt to wipe my hand off. Good grief, what is this stuff made of! Then I had to check the front of my jacket and sweater to make sure I had not slimed right down the front of myself. That would be interesting to explain at my meeting...sorry about the stain, I spit up this morning! Thank goodness there was no one else in the car with me, they would have been absolutely horrified by this event. Ah the life of a lap bander...note to self it may be time to start taking the peeling off your apples before you eat them.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Projectile Sliming...A New Experience!
Ok kids, this might be a little TMI for some of you who are squeamish...if so stop reading now. Ok, for those of you that can handle it, I have to tell you about my experience today with projectile sliming. OMG! I was headed to a holiday party/work meeting this morning and I decided that I should have a healthy snack prior to getting there so that I would avoid eating some high calorie, low nutrient foods. So I am driving down the road and I start eating an apple. I'm starting to feel a little tight, but I figure the feeling will pass. I am chewing like a trooper, really giving the peeling what for. Then I feel the sliming start, well guess that's my last bite of apple, so I throw the rest out the window.